Being a softball parent, how to support your child! - Lyneene Or

As a softball parent, when my children step out onto the diamond, I feel that I have worked just as hard as they have by driving them to training, packing snacks and dragging around the now infamous softball buggy from Costco. What I need to remember is that my role as a mum stops the minute they step out onto the diamond. My part is to enjoy now all of the hard work that my children and I have put into their training and appreciate their efforts, their successes and be there for them when they don't have the game that they had wished for.

As a player, I remember the best thing about playing a great game was the hug that I received from my mum and dad at the end of the game. Funny that this was the exact thing that I needed and loved when I had not performed as I had wished.

When asked to write an article about being a softball mum and supporting my children, so many angles ran through my mind, but the most obvious seemed to ask my children. So, I asked them flat out "What do you like to hear from me at the end of a game?" Both of my children responded simply. "Praise!".

Research by child and sports psychologists has found that positive reinforcement improves a child's self-esteem, self-confidence and self-worth. However, we have all stood on the sidelines of our children's games and heard a parent calling out instructions to their kids or yelling at them when they missed a crucial catch. We may have even done this ourselves over the years. So how can you be more supportive of your children while they are on the diamond and the car trip home?

I was lucky enough to play softball with Fiona Crawford who represented Australia at two Olympic Games and is a member of the NSW and Australian softball hall of fame. As you can imagine Fiona's parents have sat through many innings of softball and have supported Fiona through the many highs and lows of her career. Fiona often talks so fondly of the support that her mum showed her off the softball diamond throughout her international career. Fiona's mother Nola would openly confess that she knew nothing about the game of softball. She knew that at the end of the game Fiona did not need her mum pointing out her faults, but instead needed her positive support as we should all give as parents and positive role models.  Nola would famously remind Fiona that she had the "prettiest ponytail" on the diamond, a comment that I think highlights our role as parents. Our purpose is not to coach, not to criticise, not to belittle, but to encourage, put a smile on our children's face and remind ourselves and our children why they play sport…. for fun.

So, I challenge you to support your child with praise both on and off the diamond. Fill your child with positive reinforcement and support for your coach in a positive manner and if nothing else comes to your mind remind your kids that they had "the prettiest ponytail" (or most handsome hair) out there on the diamond.